When we choose to forgive, are we really forgiving? Everyone that person harms and hurts could be free from them. We forgive but its not really about the person, is it? It’s all about me. It’s not about that person repenting it's about me telling them, 'I forgive you because the only way I could go on is to let you go.'

I have been allowing you to hold me hostage for a very long time. I need to set myself free from you, as well as, for myself. It’s not about setting you free it’s about setting myself free. I will not be held hostage ever again. We hold onto it and in a crazy way it leaves us in the darkness where we can’t breath or see anything.

I have forgiven those that hurt me and I have forgiven myself for those that I hurt. Sometimes we wait too long to tell someone I forgive you or I forgive myself. The person has left this earth and we continue to hold the darkness within us. I wouldn't want to carry their darkness in my mind, that would be too much for me. Some might say, 'it’s easier to forgive yourself than to say it to someone else. My answer to that is, no we make it difficult. We choose not to reach out to those that hurt us. We choose not to ask for forgiveness even to the ones we misled.

I had a student who was a bully when he was in his teens and I told him someday you will see him again and when that day comes you know what you have to do. He said that he couldn’t do it because he was so ashamed of himself and embarrassed for what he did to him. He couldn’t believe he did that to another human being. 

The day came when my student ran into him at a party and he couldn’t believe it. He said that he was sweating so much. He reached out to the guy but he didn’t recognize him. My student was so afraid, not of the guy, but that he chose to take this step. I was so proud of him. He told the guy who he was and at one point he thought the guy was going to hit him. However, all he said was, 'oh yeah I remember you. The kid that bullied the rest of the kids. You know, that was fucked up.' My student replied, 'yes it was, I am taking this moment to say I am really sorry.'

We think at the moment that what we are doing is cool and you find out later on it isn't. The guy looks at him and said thank you that means a lot to me you have no idea. To make this story short, they spent most of time talking about school and life. They ended up exchanging numbers. That is what I am talking about, both were set free.

Forgiveness is about letting go and allowing yourself to feel free. Again, that’s why we do forgive for it has always been about us. Don’t you think it's about time to let go and go on with your life? No matter how horrible our experiences have been we shouldn’t hold on to our anger and frustration. All it does is hold us back in our life, as well as, our journey. We could all say if I could of done things differently, listened, or have been more aware then maybe things would be different. Could of, would of, should of. It happened, we can’t wish it away.

It is what it is, all we can do is be set free. Forgiving is a big step and I understand that but we need to go onward. Like I said before, it's not about the person it's about you letting go. Some might say, 'I just can’t,' and that’s because it is easy to hold onto that anger than going forward in your life. Well, that is messed up. You choose to live like that and not fight to go ahead.

Isn’t it better to let go and do things for the positive and not the negative? Why let your ego and pride ruin you more than what you are? That pride and ego can take you down. It is a waste of your life and journey to hold on and never ever live or enjoy life. You are only fooling yourselves if you think that is the way to life. We are good at lying to ourselves. We feed into it for we don’t know any better.

We choose not to advance in our progress because we find ourselves so comfortable where we are at. Even if it’s hurting us; we prefer hurting ourselves because we feel sorry for ourselves. As long as we have pity for ourselves it makes it ok and everyone has to suffer because of it. That is not right when they did nothing to cause the situation. Now if it is a situation that someone caused then we still should forgive.

I know bad things happen and people choose to close their eyes or they choose not to get involved, they turn their heads the other way. But that is something they have to live with, not I. There are people that can help you, so go get help. Please don’t let pride and ego get in the way of your growth.

We think that if we see someone for help people might think we are crazy. The hell with them and what they think. They’re not going through what I am going through. All they want to do is help you but if you choose to stay hard-headed then that is your choice.

You might not be ready and that is understandable but you can’t stay like this for years either. You’re a parent whom had a difficult situation in your youth or are having one as an adult. You definitely have to fix it because you have children. It doesn’t help the children for they will suffer and gain insecurities, as well as, feel a loss of confidence within themselves.

Why would you want that for your child? Children can sense and feel. Children, especially babies are not stupid at all. Babies can feel anger, frustration, hate, and danger. Children are smart we just don’t give them enough credit. 

I am not talking about teaching them how to read or write. I think children should be children. I am talking about the sprit that is with them, the one that guides them but that is another story. Life is difficult as it is please don’t make it more than what it is. Wake up and get it together. Don’t waste time and let go of what needs to be so you can fulfill your purpose. Life will hit us hard even devastate our lives but we need to go ahead and pick ourselves up. We all will feel it one way or another. No one gets away with it, though we might think we do. 

Everybody blames the Higher Power right away and that is not His doing. Come on, wake up! We live in a cruel world and there are many evil people in it. The innocents pay the price for those evil assholes. The governments being one of those assholes but that is another story. 

No matter what happens in this world and the people in it you should know how to let go and allow yourselves to feel free. You matter and you are a very special person no one can take anything away from you for what you have inside will always be yours. If you choose to give all your power to the person that harms YOU that is your choice.