Life has a way of sending things your way that you may not be prepared to handle. Who says we can’t handle it? We don’t know how we are going to deal with things until it happens. We always have choices and it’s always up to us. Do we live in guilt and depression and just give up? Or do we decide to live on and make a difference? It’s really up to you. Tragedy occurs, and we fall apart because we don’t know how we are going to deal with it or how to go through the devastation. 

We blame ourselves for this accident and I get it, because that is the first thing we do as human beings. You take the guilt because you are a caring human being. It wasn’t your fault; it was an accident and just that. Though it is hard on you, you need time to make peace with yourself and learn how to forgive yourself. They are no words in this moment that is going to make it easier for you. You’re the only one that can do that by allowing yourself to feel what you need to feel and cry if you need to. Allow yourself to feel angry and yell if you need to. Allow yourself to look in the mirror and let it all out. Don’t let your frustration spill over on the people you love; don’t attack them because that is not acceptable.

Go see someone you can talk to about what you are feeling. Don’t let ego or pride get in the way of your ability to get help. Don’t be afraid of the unknown; it’s just a new door you are going through. If you want to make a difference than do something with your life and make it worth something. Don’t let this lead you into the negative; make it worthwhile and make those two lives mean something. You have a chance so use it for positivity even though you don’t see that right now. No one is going to know how you really feel; only you. They can’t know because they didn’t go through what you went through; all they want to do is help you even if their kind of help is not what you need at the time.

No one knows how to act or respond in this situation but just know that everyone is coming from a place of love for you. The only one that needs to make a difference is you.   

This will change you and you won’t ever be the same person you were yesterday. Without you realizing it, you have already changed even though you don’t see it yet. Tragic devastations change us whether we see it or not; try not to be hard on yourself.

Take this tragedy and use it to grow and learn by becoming better within yourself and your life. Make things matter by doing the best that you can. I understand that you’re going to feel bad, sad, guilty, or even give up on yourself. All those feelings are natural, but we can’t feed into those feelings either. You will feel that way, but you don’t need to stay there in that darkness. 

Don’t think that getting drunk or high is the answer because it’s not; it will take you where you don’t need to be. You definitely won’t find answers there for sure. Everything will come in time; just give yourself the time you need to be whole again and don’t rush it because that doesn’t work either.

You’re not there to please anyone but yourself so take it day by day. Help yourself by asking others for help. What I ask and pray for you is that you give yourself a chance and face what is necessary for you to face so that in time you let it go. What I wish for you is that you can be able to stand up stronger, more courageous, accept the person that you see in that mirror, and realize how great and special you are and that you are worth a great deal. In time, give yourself that chance to see that person in the mirror.